But I thought it necessary to send to you Epaphroditus: Anagkaion de hegesamen (1SAMI) Epaphroditon : (Phil 4:18)

I thought (2233) (hegeomai [word study] from middle deponent of ágo = to lead) primarily signifies to lead then, consider and so to think about and come to a conclusion.

Hegeomai is a mathematical term which involves careful thought and not come to a quick or hasty decision.

An excellent illustration of the meaning of this word is Moses in (He 11:26-note) who thought through his decision, weighing the pros and cons. He weighed what Egypt had to offer against what God offered. When he reached a conclusion it was well-founded and certain. God’s offer was infinitely superior in every way. In the eyes of the world no reproach (being ridiculed and persecuted) would be worth sacrificing riches for. Yet Moses believed that the worst he could endure for Christ would be more valuable than the best of the world. And so Paul aware of his circumstances makes a conscious judgment resting upon his deliberate weighing of all the facts.

Necessary (316) (anagkaios from anagke [word study] = necessity) means what one can not do without and so that which is indispensable. Anagkaios is a very strong word.  Paul reasoned that this was what was required by the circumstances.

Epaphroditus (Dictionary) (1891) is mentioned only in the present epistle and according to Vincent is derived from Aphrodite (Venus), and means charming and how well he lived up to his name. Others say his name means "belonging to” or “favored by Aphrodite” and later came to mean “loving” or “lovely.”

my brother: ton adelphon: (2Co 2:13; 8:22; Philemon 1:1)

Robertson makes an interesting observation that there is

"one article ton (the) with the three epithets given in an ascending scale (Lightfoot), brother (adelphon, common sympathy), fellow-worker (sunergon, common work), fellow-soldier (sunstratiōtēn, common danger).

Brother (80) (adelphos from a = here denoting unity + delphús = womb) is literally those born from same womb and then descriptive of fellowship of life based on identity of origin. Fellow believers in Christ are sons of their heavenly Father and thus are united by the bond of affection and Christian love.

and fellow worker: kai sunergon: (Phil 4:3; 1Cor 3:9; 2Cor 8:23; Col 1:7; 4:11; 1Thes 3:2; Philemon 1:1,24)

Fellow worker (4904) (sunergos from  sun = together with, intimate association implied + érgon = work) refers to his co-laborer, presumably who  participated with Paul in the labors of the gospel.

Sunergos is used by Paul in 12/13 NT uses (Rom 16:3, 9, 21; 1Cor 3:9; 2Cor 1:24; 8:23; Phil 2:25; 4:3; Col 4:11; 1Th 3:2; Philemon 1:1, 24; 3John 1:8) and in this verse emphasizes a common spiritual effort in addition to a common spiritual life discussed above ("my brother"). Sunergos conveys the idea of an affectionate partnership, not merely that of an impersonal, official relationship.  

Wycliffe says sunergos is a

"term borrowed from the workshop and stressing the spirit of comradeship."

 and fellow soldier:  kai sustratioten mou: (2Ti 2:3,4; Philemon 1:2)

Fellow soldier (4961) (sustratiotes from sun = together with, emphasizing an intimate union  + stratiotes = a soldier; see study of related verb strateuomai = wage war) is an interesting combination word, the prefixed preposition "sun" speaking of an intimate association and thus picturing saints fighting side by side against onslaught from seen and unseen foes. Phillips picks up on this picture, translating it as comrade-in-arms.

 Christians and Christian ministers are compared with soldiers Philemon 1:2; 2Timothy 2:3; 2:4 (note) because of the nature of the service in which they are engaged. The Christian life is a warfare with many foes to be overcome. Like Roman soldiers, the period which they are to serve is fixed by the Great Captain of our salvation, and all Christian soldiers will soon and eternally be permitted to enjoy the fruit of victory. Paul regarded himself as enlisted to make war on all the spiritual enemies of the Redeemer, and he esteemed Epaphroditus as one who had shown that he was worthy to be engaged in so good a cause.

For more detailed discussion of Christian soldiers see note on 2Timothy 2:3-4 and also compilation from various resources entitled "A Good Soldier".

Gill has a thoughtful summary of the Christian as a soldier noting that

"the life of every believer is a warfare; he is always engaged in a war with sin, and Satan, and the world; and is often called to fight the fight of faith, to contend earnestly against false teachers for the faith once delivered to the saints, to stand up for it, and fast in it; and is provided for with the whole armour of God, with weapons of warfare, which are not carnal, but spiritual and mighty, being enlisted as a volunteer under the great Captain of his salvation, Jesus Christ, under whose banner he fights, and is more than a conqueror through him: but though this is the common case and character of all the saints, it more especially belongs to ministers of the Gospel; who are set for the defence of it, and at the front of the battle, and are called to meet the enemy at the gate, and endure hardness as good soldiers of Jesus Christ"

who is also your messenger and minister to my need: humon de apostolon kai leitourgon tes chreias mou: (Pr 25:13; Jn 17:18; 2Co 8:23; Heb 3:1) (Phil 4:18; 2Cor 11:7, 8, 9)

Messenger (652) (apostolos [word study] from apo = from + stello = send forth) is literally a "sent one" which conveys the basic idea of one who is sent to do a job and associates authority with the assignment.

Apostolos - 80x in 79v - Matt 10:2; Mark 3:14; 6:30; Luke 6:13; 9:10; 11:49; 17:5; 22:14; 24:10; John 13:16; Acts 1:2, 26; 2:37, 42f; 4:33, 35ff; 5:2, 12, 18, 29, 40; 6:6; 8:1, 14, 18; 9:27; 11:1; 14:4, 14; 15:2, 4, 6, 22f; 16:4; Rom 1:1; 11:13; 16:7; 1 Cor 1:1; 4:9; 9:1f, 5; 12:28f; 15:7, 9; 2 Cor 1:1; 8:23; 11:5, 13; 12:11f; Gal 1:1, 17, 19; Eph 1:1; 2:20; 3:5; 4:11; Phil 2:25; Col 1:1; 1 Thess 2:7; 1 Tim 1:1; 2:7; 2 Tim 1:1, 11; Titus 1:1; Heb 3:1; 1 Pet 1:1; 2 Pet 1:1; 3:2; Jude 1:17; Rev 2:2; 18:20; 21:14. NAS = apostle(18), Apostle(1), apostles(52), apostles'(5), messenger(m)(1), messengers(m)(1),one who is sent(1).

The secular Greek writer Demosthenes gives a picture of the meaning of "apostolos" using the term to describe a cargo ship sent out with a load. He also spoke of a naval fleet as "apostles" sent out to accomplish a mission.

Epaphroditus was thus sent out as a "messenger" from the church at Philippi to bring relief to Paul who acknowledged his arrival writing that

"I have received everything in full and have an abundance; I am amply supplied, having received from Epaphroditus what you have sent, a fragrant aroma, an acceptable sacrifice, well-pleasing to God" (see note Philippians 4:18)

A parallel use of apostolos is found in the second epistle to the Corinthians where Paul wrote

"as for our brethren, they are messengers (apostolos) of the churches, a glory to Christ" (2Cor 8:23)

In the preceding verse Paul is describing the men who were responsible for the handling and transporting of the funds. Thus churches apparently sent out their own "messengers" for various purposes but these were separate and distinct from the "apostles of Jesus Christ," each of whom had been been specifically chosen and sent out in person by resurrected Christ. There is no continuity of these apostles of Jesus Christ since in no place were the churches instructed to ordain apostles and furthermore none would be able to fulfill the criteria necessary for one to be a true apostle of Jesus Christ.

Minister (3011) (leitourgos [word study] from léïtos = of the people + érgon = work > English = liturgy) a person in service of state who held public office who was so passionately dedicated to his duties that he discharged them at his own expense.

Need (5532) (chreia [word study] from chréos = debt) from chraomai = to use, make use of or chreos = a debt) means a necessity, what is needed or the occasion of need. Here it refers to something lacking and needed. In other words it refers to Paul's necessities.

Barclay elaborates

"In secular Greek this was a magnificent word. In the ancient days in the Greek cities there were men who, because they loved their city so much, at their own expense undertook certain great civic duties. It might be to defray the expenses of an embassy, or the cost of putting on one of the dramas of the great poets, or of training the athletes who would represent the city in the games, or of fitting out a warship and paying a crew to serve in the navy of the state. These men were the supreme benefactors of the state and they were known as leitourgoi ."

In the Septuagint (LXX) leitourgos was used primarily in reference to the Old Testament priestly service to God and of service to man. Similarly the most common NT meaning of leitourgos describes service to the Lord by believers. (Click the 5 NT uses)

Wuest adds that

because he was longing for you all: epeide epipothon (PAPMSN) en (3SIAI) pantas humas: (Phil 1:3,8; 4:1; 2Sa 13:39; Ro 1:11; 2Co 9:14)

Longing (1971) (epipotheo [word study] from epi = either an intensifier or marking direction of the desire + potheo = to yearn) means to desire earnestly, long for greatly, intensely crave possession or have great affection for. The LXX (Greek Septuagint) uses this verb to translate David's deep desire for God --

As the deer pants for (epipotheo) the water brooks, so my soul pants for (epipotheo) Thee, O God. (Ps 42:1)

The use in David's psalm gives us a sense of the great heart of Epaphroditus who was intensely longing for his beloved saints at Philippi. The present tense indicates this longing was not a spasmodic yearning but a continual habitual expression of his heart attitude.

AND was distressed because you had heard that he was sick: kai ademonon (PAPMSN) dioti ekousate (2SAAI) hoti esthenesen. (3SAAI): (Job 9:27; Ps 69:20; Pr 12:25; Isa 61:3; Mt 11:28; Mt 26:37 Ro 9:2; 1Pe 1:6) (2Sa 24:17; Jn 11:35,36; Acts 21:13; Ro 12:15; 1Cor 12:26; Gal 6:2; Eph 3:13)

Distressed (85) ("excessively concerned") (ademoneo from a derivative of adeo = to be sated to loathing) means to be  distressed, deeply troubled or  distressed, this intense discomfort being quite plain. Be sorely troubled. Be upset. Be dismayed. Be in anguish.

Thayer says ademoneo originates from the alpha privative "a" and the root word demos meaning home. This combination yields the literal meaning of not at home and accordingly uncomfortable. In fairness, the reader should understand this origin although it sounds plausible is disputed by other authorities. For example, Moulton and Milligan write that "Towards the etymology of this word, T. W. Allen (CR xx. p. 5) traces an adjective (the Greek word) demon in the Iliad (M 213), with the meaning “knowing” “prudent,” so that ademoneo would suggest originally bewilderment."

Epaphroditus was almost overwhelmed with sorrow, like our Lord was in Gethsemane, Matthew writing that He

began to be grieved and distressed. (ademoneo)  (Mt 26:37)

The only other NT use is Mark's parallel description of the Lord in Gethsemane...

Mark 14:33 And He took with Him Peter and James and John, and began to be very distressed (ekthambeo) and troubled (ademoneo) .

Ademoneo describes the confused, chaotic, heavy state of restlessness that results from a time of turmoil or great trauma. Epaphroditus was more concerned about the Philippians’ worry for him than he was about his own difficult situation.

Wuest adds an interesting note that ademoneo

"finds its origin in a word that has the idea of “not at home,” thus, “uncomfortable, troubled, distressed.” The word does not refer to homesickness, but to the discomfort of not being at home. Thus the heart of Epaphroditus was not at rest. The reason for this restlessness was that he was concerned that the Philippians had heard of his illness and were themselves concerned over their messenger for whom they in a measure held themselves responsible. What a miracle divine grace had wrought in the hearts of these Greeks who had recently come up out of rank paganism!

He had become sick (770) (astheneo [word study]  from asthenes [see study] = without strength, powerless from a = without + sthenos = strength, bodily vigor) means to be feeble (in any sense), to be diseased, impotent, sick,  to lack strength, to be infirm, to be weak.

C H Mackintosh has some devotional thoughts on the character of Epaphroditus...

There is great moral beauty in it. We are not told very much about him, but in what we are told, we see a great deal of what is truly lovely and pleasant — much that makes us long for men of the same stamp in this our day. We cannot do better than quote the inspired record concerning him; and may the blessed Spirit apply it to our hearts and lead us to cultivate the same lovely grace which shone so brightly in that dear and honored servant of Christ!

“I supposed it necessary,” says the blessed apostle, “to send to you Epaphroditus, my brother and companion in labor, and fellow-soldier, but your messenger and he that ministered to my wants. For he longed after you all and was full of heaviness, because that ye had heard that he had been sick. For indeed he was sick nigh unto death; but God had mercy on him, and not on him only, but on me also, lest I should have sorrow upon sorrow. I sent him therefore the more carefully, that when ye see him again, ye may rejoice, and that I may be the less sorrowful. Receive him therefore in the Lord with all gladness; and hold such in reputation, because for the work of Christ he was nigh unto death, not regarding his life, to supply your lack of service toward me” (Phil. 2: 25-30).

Now it is quite possible that some of us, on reading the above, may feel disposed to inquire if Epaphroditus was a great evangelist or teacher or some highly gifted servant of Christ, seeing the inspired apostle bestows upon him so many high and honorable titles, styling him his “brother and companion in labor, and fellow-soldier.”

Well, we are not told that he was a great preacher or a great traveler or a profound teacher in the Church of God. All we are told about him in the above touching narrative is that he came forward in a time of real need to supply a missing link, to “fill a gap,” as we say. The beloved Philippians had it upon their hearts to send help to the revered and aged apostle Paul in his prison at Rome. He was in need and they longed to supply his need. They loved him, and God had laid it upon their loving hearts to communicate with his necessities. They thought of him, though he was far away from them, and they longed to minister to him of their substance.

How lovely was this! How pleasing to the heart of Christ! Hearken to the glowing terms in which the dear old prisoner speaks of their precious ministry.

“But I rejoiced in the Lord greatly, that now at the last your care of me hath flourished again; wherein ye were also careful, but ye lacked opportunity.... Notwithstanding, ye have well done that ye did communicate with my affliction. Now, ye Philippians, know also that in the beginning of the gospel, when I departed from Macedonia, no church communicated with me as concerning giving and receiving, but ye only. For even in Thessalonica ye sent once and again unto my necessity. Not because I desire a gift, but I desire fruit that may abound to your account. But I have all, and abound; I am full, having received of Epaphroditus the things from you, an odor of a sweet smell, a sacrifice acceptable, well pleasing to God” (Phil. 4: 10, 14-18).

Here we see the place which Epaphroditus filled in this blessed business. There lay the beloved apostle in his prison at Rome, and there lay the loving offering of the saints at Philippi. But how was it to be conveyed to him? These were not the days of banks checks and post-office money orders. No, nor of railway traveling. It was no easy matter to get from Philippi to Rome in those days. But Epaphroditus, that dear, unpretending, self-surrendering servant of Christ, presented himself to supply the missing link, to do the very thing that was needed and nothing more; to be the channel of communication between the assembly at Philippi and the apostle at Rome. Deep and real as was the apostle's need, precious and seasonable as was the Philippians' gift, yet an instrument was needed to bring them both together, and Epaphroditus offered himself for the work. There was a manifest need and he filled it. He did not aim at doing some great showy thing, something which would make him very prominent and cause his name to be blazed abroad as some wonderful person. Ah! no, Epaphroditus was not one of the pushing, self-confident, extensive class. He was a dear, self-hiding, lowly servant of Christ, one of that class of workmen to whom we are irresistibly attracted. Nothing is more charming than an unpretending, retiring man who is content just to fill the empty niche; to render the needed service, whatever it is; to do the work cut out for him by the Master's hand.

There are some who are not content unless they are at the head and tail of everything. They seem to think that no work can be rightly done unless they have a hand in it. They are not satisfied to supply a missing link. How repulsive are all such! How we retire from them! Self-confident, self-sufficient, ever pushing themselves into prominence. They have never measured themselves in the presence of God, never been broken down before Him, never taken their true place of self-abasement.

Epaphroditus was not of this class at all. He put his life in his hand to serve other people; and when at death's door, instead of being occupied with himself or his ailments, he was thinking of others. “He longed after you all and was full of heaviness” — not because he was sick, but — ”because ye had heard that he had been sick.” Here was true love. He knew what his beloved brethren at Philippi would be feeling when informed of his serious illness, an illness brought on by his willing-hearted service to them.

All this is morally lovely. It does the heart good to contemplate this exquisite picture. Epaphroditus had evidently studied in the school of Christ. He had sat at the Master's feet and drunk deeply into His spirit. In no other way could he have learned such holy lessons of self-surrender and thoughtful love for others. The world knows nothing of such things; nature cannot teach such lessons. They are altogether heavenly, spiritual, divine. Would that we knew more of them! They are rare among us with all our high profession. There is a most humiliating amount of selfishness in all of us, and it looks so hideous in connection with the name of Jesus. It might agree well enough with Judaism, but its inconsistency with Christianity is terribly glaring.

Notice the very touching manner in which the inspired apostle commends Epaphroditus to the assembly at Philippi. It seems as if he could not make enough of him, to speak after the manner of men.

“He longed after you all, and was full of heaviness, because that ye had heard that he had been sick. For indeed he was sick nigh unto death, but God had mercy on him, and not on him only, but on me also, lest I should have sorrow upon sorrow.”

How deeply affecting! What a tide of divine affection and sympathy rolled in upon that unpretending, self-sacrificing servant of Christ! The whole assembly at Philippi, the blessed apostle and above all, God Himself all engaged in thinking about a man who did not think about himself. Had Epaphroditus been a self-seeker, had he been occupied about himself or his interests, or even his work, his name would never have shone on the page of inspiration. But no; he thought of others, not of himself. Therefore God and His apostle and His Church thought of him.

Thus it will ever be.

A man who thinks much of himself saves others the trouble of thinking about him.

But the lowly, the humble, the modest, the unpretending, the retiring, the self-emptied, who think of and live for others, who walk in the footsteps of Jesus Christ, these are the persons to be thought of and cared for, loved and honored, as they ever will be by God and His people.

“I sent him therefore the more carefully,” says the beloved apostle, “that when ye see him again ye may rejoice, and that I may be the less sorrowful. Receive him therefore in the Lord with all gladness; and hold such in reputation. Because for the work of Christ he was nigh unto death, not regarding his life, to supply your lack of service toward me” (Phil. 2: 28-30).

For indeed he was sick to the point of death: kai gar esthenesen (3SAAI) paraplesion thanato:(30; 2Ki 20:1; Ps 107:18; Ecc 9:1,2; Jn 11:3,4; Ac 9:37)

Sick (770) (astheneo [word study] from a = without + sthénos = strength, bodily vigor) means to be diseased, enfeebled, weak, without strength.

To the point of (3897) (paraplesion from pará = close to + plesíos = near and figuratively = neighbor) means literally “alongside of a neighbor” and then nearby or close to. As the KJV puts it Epaphroditus was "nigh unto death", the word paraplesion picturing "death" as  just next door. And so Epaphroditus and "death" were next door neighbors! 

but God had mercy on him and not on him only but also on me: alla o theos eleesen (3SAAI) auton ouk auton de monon alla kai eme: (Job 5:19; Ps 30:1-3,10,11; 34:19; 103:3,4; 107:19-22; Isa 38:17;43:2; Acts 9:39-41) (Isa 27:8; Jer 8:18; 10:24; 45:3; Hab 3:2; 1Cor 10:13; 2Cor 2:7)

Mercy (1653) (eleeo [word study] from eleos [word study] = mercy) means to show compassion and extend help for the consequences of sin. When God spares a person from death it is always a reflection of His mercy, because “the wages of sin is death” (see note Romans 6:23) and every human being is a sinner (see note Romans 3:23).

Are you a weary wayfarer in need of God's great mercies which are new every morning? Spurgeon has the following illustration of mercy provided to weary wayfarers...

What a rugged, precipitous, ungainly pass is that Col D'Obbia! It was shrewd common sense, and true humanity which suggested the erection of that poor little hospice at the summit. Never was a shelter more opportune, a refuge more welcome. One could not have expected to find a retreat in so desolate a region, but there it was, and we were received into it with cordiality. The great Lord of pilgrims has taken care that in the hardest parts of our road to the Celestial City there should be blessed resting places, where beneath the shade of promises, weary ones may repose within the shelter of love. God's hospice may be confidently looked for whenever the way is more than ordinarily difficult.

><>><>><>

I remember well being taken one day to see a gorgeous palace at Venice, where every piece of furniture was made with most exquisite taste, and of the richest material, where statues and pictures of enormous price abounded on all hands, and the floor of each room was paved with mosaics of marvellous art, and extraordinary value. As I was shown from room to room, and allowed to roam amid the treasures by its courteous owner, I felt a considerable timidity, I was afraid to sit anywhere, nor did I hardly dare to put down my foot, or rest my hand to lean. Everything seemed to be too good for ordinary mortals like myself; but when one is introduced into the gorgeous palace of infinite goodness, costlier and fairer far, one gazes wonderingly with reverential awe at the matchless vision. "How excellent is Thy lovingkindness, O God!" "I am not worthy of the least of all thy benefits. Oh! the depths of the love and goodness of the Lord." — Feathers for Arrows

Imagination fails to guess the height of heaven, and even thus the riches of God's mercy exceed our highest thoughts. —  The Interpreter

so that I would not have sorrow upon sorrow: hina me lupen epi lupen scho. (1SAAS):

Sorrow upon sorrow - The picture of sorrow heaped up or piled upon more sorrow. God is merciful to His children and here protected Paul from such an extreme degree of distress.

Sorrow (3077) (lupe - see study of related verb lupeo = to cause one to experience severe mental or emotional distress or physical pain) means sadness, grief or heaviness.

Spurgeon gives an apt illustration of sorrow, an intruder few of us welcome into our life...

Two seeds lie before us—the one is warmed in the sun, the other falls from the sower's hand into the cold dark earth, and there it lies buried beneath the soil. That seed which suns itself in the noontide beam may rejoice in the light in which it basks, but it is liable to be devoured by the bird; and certainly nought can come of it, however long it may linger above ground; but the other seed, hidden beneath the clods in a damp, dark sepulchre, soon swells, germinates, bursts its sheath, upheaves the mould, springs up a green blade, buds, blossoms, becomes a flower, exhales perfume, and loads the wings of every wind. Better far for the seed to pass into the earth and die, than to lie in the sunshine and produce no fruit; and even thus for thee the future in its sorrow shall be as a sowing in a fertile land; tears shall moisten thee, grace shall increase within thee, and thou shalt grow up in the likeness of thy Lord unto perfection of holiness, to be such a flower of God's own planting as even angels shall delight to gaze upon in the day of thy transplanting to celestial soil.— Feathers for Arrows